Revision Activities Due Wednesday, Sept. 17th

Before class Wednesday, try two of these REVISION activities with your own essay. There will be a short quiz at the beginning of class over which two activities you tried and how well they worked for you.

Choose 2:

1. Create a New Outline based only on the actual paper you wrote. This will help you clarify whether any new points could be added in and where you might want to move or reorder your paragraphs.

2. Cut/Paste: Print out and cut up your paper into individual paragraphs. Mix up the paragraphs and then have someone try to put them back in order. If they found this difficult, could you add in clearer transitions. Did their reordering give you any new ideas about your own organization?

3. Read the paper aloud as dramatically as you can. Try to make it come alive. If you can't "perform" the paper with enthusiasm or emotion, perhaps it's a good sign that you should add more action, description, or shorten up some sentences so that it will be more exciting for the reader.

4. Label or highlight each of the sensory descriptions in a different color: Sound, Touch, Sight, Smell, Taste. Is there a variety throughout the paper? Does the paper have balanced descriptions?

5. Count/Label the compound/complex vs. simple sentences. Think about the 5 short sentence activity from last week. Is there variety? Do you have any sections that are short/choppy. Remember, short sentences move the action, whereas long sentences slow down the reader's thoughts.

6. Choose 10 adjectives and/or verbs and replace them with more concrete, original phrases. Cut down on repetitive and overused words and phrases like: wonderful, awesome, amazing, great, very, is, are, was, "there is", "there are"; impact, and, of course, TEXT LANGUAGE!

7. Take a Picture that helps make the details more concrete and add it in to the paper.

8. Write a brand new intro or conclusion paragraph that is completely different from your original. The conclusion can be really short (3 sentences) that just leaves the reader with a final impression or judgment, or possibly a call to action.